Show of Hands

I think it's a sad state of affairs when people are worried about embarrassment when discussing medical issues.

I wanted to wait until the ambulance arrived so that I know she is getting the medical attention she needs. My sex shouldn't matter.

No. Staying was the right and compassionate thing to do.

It was a fairly crowded area. No other male student stopped to help. Only females.

How sexually repressed is a society where the men do not help their women because they're worried about embarrassing them?

I'm very angry right now.

Of course not. You were caring for an injured person. To hell with the old lady, you're doing the right thing.

That's ridiculous. Good for you for staying there. I know if I were hurt I wouldn't care what sex was helping me as long as someone was there.

You did the right thing.

That's crazy! I'm happy you stayed and helped. Don't let others tell you to leave. That just makes me shake my head.

As a female, I can tell you that in this situation I would appreciate assistance and support from someone regardless of gender. You were right to stay and be of assistance.

that is one of THE most stupid things I have heard in a very long time.

Of course not. You were caring for a possibly injured child.

You did the right thing but it would be up to the injured person, not grandma. I can't blame her for having an old fashioned point of view, that's just a generational gap.

It makes no difference who they are or where they're damaged, if I'm able to help, I'm helping. Old people almost always mean well, but sometimes it's best to politely ignore them.

That was my assumption, yes.

Anyone who saw her would have been able to clearly see where she was bleeding. I'm assuming the men must have decided against helping because it was a sexually sensitive injury.

Exactly.

The only thing I can think of that might explain her concern is that maybe she felt the young girl would be embarrassed or feel extremely vulnerable because of the location of the bleeding. Was it possibly menstrual blood or injury?

Is the fact that no other male student stopped a consequence this irrational stigma? That would make society's push for sensitivity entirely self-defeating in situations like this.

Why would she suggest he leave if she hadn't been elderly? Because she probably wouldn't have. My generation and younger (and even a little older) grew up in a coed environment.

It's an odd thing. When I was in nursing school in the 60's, our two male classmates (both married, one with kids) were forbidden to be in the delivery room by 3 of the big wheel OB docs -- who were male. We couldn't figure that out.

I'm actually trying to give her the benefit if the doubt because she is elderly. Because otherwise her attitude is impossible to make an excuse for.

As an "older lady" (71), I second what Susan said.

On behalf of sane old people, I apologize for what this silly woman felt & said.

Not much I can do about the younger males who weren't helpful, but I'm glad you were.

Irony - LOL -- I understand. I might also mention some of my best friends are blacks and gays. ;-)

She was in her 50s. Zod is clearly not bashing old people. Don't be ridiculous.

I certainly don't write off all older people like that. That's a huge generalization. The elderly are a source of tremendous wisdom.

Most young people get old before they die, you know. I wouldn't want to hate myself when I get older.

No, her skin color would have been irrelevant to the question. In this case, the age provides additional context for the situation because most people know I'm a college student. By specifying her age, I imply that she is not a student.

This makes me mad. I can't believe someone would even consider this in the case of emergency.

You won't find many my age or younger in this country who would suggest the sex of the victim and person offering first aid would be an issue. At all. It's hard to imagine, but many of our older people grew up in a very repressive time.

Sorry if anyone offended you because of my poll, 2katz. I'm sure that was not their intent.

I love old people personally. I could spend hours talking to them, listening to their stories. Most are far more interesting than people my age.

I assume you're talking about those raised during the depression. Anyone younger than that generation wouldn't restrict help based on gender.
As a 60's kid, I'd like to think we would help this young girl or anyone else of either gender.

The "old lady" was in her 50's. (OhTheIrony clarified this in another comment.)

The girl told us that she had recently torn something down there(I don't remember exactly what she said) and that this injury probably had reopened that wound.

I'm hoping she's better now. It's been more than 24 hours.

I'd like to think that all of us "older people" aren't being written off as "just being like that" by the younger folks on SOH who expect to be considered credible and knowledgable by everyone.

50's is being considered "elderly" here?

Not all. Just the ones who grew up with a lot of conservative thoughts and lessons from their parents that they kept while the world evolved around them. You'll see it in small towns across the country. It's just some elders.

And it's not really a fault, per se. Just ignorance and an unchanged environmental life.

Zim, that describes me. I'm 66 and I now live in the same small town I grew up in. I'm not ignorant. But these comments are feeling ignorant and offensive now.

I said "older lady" not elderly, haha.

If she had been say, black or Hispanic, would you have said "this black lady hinted that I should leave?"

I take your comments as a slam against old people. The question said it was an older lady. But it could have been anyone. I don't think she hinted for him to leave because she was old.

I was never trying to offend you. I promise. Like I said, it's not all old people. Realistically, I don't see them as old - who am I to say they are old? I just have met and known people that grew up differently than I. Whether it was a different...

It doesn't where they are injured, you definitely did the thing.

How awful to have it happen twice. I imagine it was the older lady trying to protect the little girl's innocence. She was trying to be nice. You shouldn't take it personally.

place or generation. My mother would have been one of those to say maybe you should go on, I'll take care of this. That's in her mindset that the little girl might be more comfortable with her. As a woman. Yes, *I* realize it's not the correct way...

right thing*

That's just what older people do, their generation was different from ours. You are very kind to stop and help and continue to stay. How ridiculous that not everyone around didn't do the same. Ugh.

to deal with this situation. But she, and any other people like her, think they are doing the right thing. It's a difficult world to keep up with. All the changes and political corrected-ness. Everyone's has an opinion on how to deal with a situation

And not everyone will respond the same and think maybe others dealt with it the 'wrong' way. I think you and I are on the same page, I'm just describing what I see/know. Not a fact, just observations.

No. You shouldn't leave the scene of an accident until the proper people arrive to take over. Be more worried about liability than social discomfort.