Show of HandsShow of Hands

Praetorianus December 9th, 2017 4:56am

Have some time to kill so one more question: the age of sexual consent is between 16 and 18 in the US and many foreign countries. If a 30 y/o dates a 16 y/o where this is legal, is it still wrong?

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Hogoke Constitution
12/09/17 8:49 am

It's morally wrong but not legally

rons screw politicians
12/09/17 8:42 am

Sure it’s ok. Women get older and become cougars.

RNJen Bay Area USA
12/09/17 8:19 am

It’s wrong. A 16 year old lacks insight and judgement, her brain hasn’t fully developed. She is still under the wing of mom and dad. The 30 year old is praying on her. It’s absolutely wrong. It is also illegal for them to have a sexual relationship in every state

Praetorianus Fair enough.
12/09/17 8:28 am

No it isn't.
Not every state has R&J laws.
Example Kansas:

RNJen Bay Area USA
12/09/17 8:37 am

Oh I didn’t realize Kansas was still behind on that:/ still wrong for every reason I stated

Praetorianus Fair enough.
12/09/17 9:10 am

I don't think they're behind.
In the past decades, sex laws in Western society have become more lenient with the fall of sodomy laws being the latest.
Also, some countries like France and Germany have lowered their age of consent but at the same time prosecute pedophilia more strictly. It seems more and more places set 16, not 18 as the limit, possibly taking into account that due to better sex ed and general savviness of adolescents, a higher aoc is phased out.

Zach21 California
12/09/17 9:26 am

Jen why do you assume the 16 y/o is a she?

RNJen Bay Area USA
12/09/17 10:14 am

Zach- I’m just generalizing because it is normally a she. If it’s a he, than same goes

RNJen Bay Area USA
12/09/17 10:21 am

Praet- many things years ago was okay, but we are now more educated. Children do not have a developed mind at 16. A 30 year old has already made their path. In order to create a better society, we have to give children a chance to develope, the parents need a chance to help them develope.

Suzan Hawaii
12/09/17 8:03 am

A 16-year-old still has the judgment and emotional maturity of a 16-year-old. The couple needs to wait

Praetorianus Fair enough.
12/09/17 8:14 am

For how long?
Our age of majority is 18 but that's just an arbitrary number. Until bone growth is complete (21)? Until brain development is done (25)?
Good luck trying to introduce an aoc 25.

Suzan Hawaii
12/09/17 8:16 am

I say at least until the brain stops growing at 25. Emotional maturity I have no idea when and how to achieve it.

Praetorianus Fair enough.
12/09/17 8:36 am

Complete maturity is never reached.
Life is a transition from immaturity to senility 😸

Suzan Hawaii
12/10/17 11:11 pm

You are correct. We mature into life

Finny Conservative Lesbian
12/09/17 7:22 am

The age of consent under 18 which would be 16 or 17 only applies to 4 years above their age. So it’s only legal for a 16 year old to date a 20 year old

Finny Conservative Lesbian
12/09/17 7:23 am

Well, technically have sex but that comes with dating typically these days

Praetorianus Fair enough.
12/09/17 7:35 am

Romeo and Juliet laws aka affirmative defense don't exist everywhere. Not in every state and definitely not in my former home country Germany where it's 16 in general and 14 under a sort of R&J law but basically only prosecuted on complaint.

Kay41 the Midwest
12/09/17 6:44 am

What makes it wrong to me is the difference in emotional and developmental growth (brain development). Being around this age group all day, year after year as a teacher, I can see how the vast majority of 16 year olds are not mature enough to handle a relationship of that sort, especially a sexual relationship. They are often too emotional immature to handle relationships with people their own age. But, at least with that, they are both learning, growing, and developing at a similar pace and level.

Praetorianus Fair enough.
12/09/17 6:48 am

Why is it better when the blind lead the blind?
A gentle, caring, more mature person should be more adequate than someone just as inexperienced.
Sounds logical to me.

Kay41 the Midwest
12/09/17 6:58 am

Because I believe that 16 year olds are not ready to have sex yet. I think they aren't really ready to have any kind of real, long-lasting relationship yet. So, having them with people their own age (sort of starter relationships) is ideal. Both participants can navigate a immature relationship together and learn for themselves what is important, what they want, and how to be. If they are paired with someone much older with already formed opinions, they will be far more subjected to having that person's relationship ideas forced on them. They will feel much more pressured into having sex without the maturity to be able to say no easily. To me, the brain of a 16 year old is not ready to handle a romantic relationship with someone much older.

Praetorianus Fair enough.
12/09/17 7:07 am

Believe it or not, teens DO have sex.
This can lead to unwanted teenage pregnancy.
Not so much when a more mature person guides who even may recognize it if they're uncomfortable to "go all the way" and respect it.
I'm retired but know about this.

Kay41 the Midwest
12/09/17 7:13 am

Of course teens have sex. I never said they didn't. I said most are not ready to.

But, I think we will have to agree to disagree here. I just don't think you are right in this idea and vice versa. I don't think either of us will change the other's mind. In fact, I wasn't trying to change your mind, rather just stating my opinion. I saw below that you said you'd put people on ignore if they disagreed with you here. Feel free to do that, although I'd find that a rather immature thing to do if you did.

Praetorianus Fair enough.
12/09/17 7:23 am

I won't ignore you.
I said I'd ignore those who "strongly oppose".
That was too mild a wording.
I mean those who summarily call it creepy and perverted, not just wrong.

Kay41 the Midwest
12/09/17 7:26 am

Ah, I see. Good, because I enjoy your polls and don't mind that we disagree on some topics.

12/09/17 6:28 am

It shows the person lacks self confidence and has a predatory nature. The person is preying on young people because they haven't yet developed there own ability to discern creepy behavior. As these young people mature, they develop an inner radar for creeps like Moore.

Praetorianus Fair enough.
12/09/17 6:49 am

Some are creeps but why would all be?

kspells TheOtherOtherside
12/09/17 1:28 am

It is wrong and illegal in states with Age Gap Provisions.

Praetorianus Fair enough.
12/08/17 11:46 pm

OK, let's get this straight:
If you strongly oppose a legal relationship between a 16 y/o and a 30 y/o say so and expect to be ignored.
I am not a slave to your opinion and welcome yours but if you call it downright perverted, I want no part of you.

Praetorianus Fair enough.
12/08/17 11:47 pm

Do bring it on 😌

kspells TheOtherOtherside
12/09/17 1:29 am

It is wrong and illegal in states with Age Gap Provisions. Which most states do have.

Praetorianus Fair enough.
12/09/17 1:31 am

Romeo and Juliet laws, I oppose them.

kspells TheOtherOtherside
12/09/17 1:33 am

Your opposition to the laws is irrelevant.

Praetorianus Fair enough.
12/09/17 1:39 am

If you think like this, why even vote? Your vote is irrelevant!

Praetorianus Fair enough.
12/09/17 1:42 am

You probably heard I helped strike down the aoc in Austria, right?
I was hot damn relevant back then.
Were you relevant in a political decision. When, where?
I'd respect it.

Praetorianus Fair enough.
12/09/17 2:17 am

But not forever.
Laws change.
Just count me in 😏

kspells TheOtherOtherside
12/09/17 4:29 am

Laws change but perverts don’t?
How about our laws have to protect the ones who can’t protect themselves.
And I’m going with, Seriously?

Praetorianus Fair enough.
12/09/17 6:46 am

Harass a 16 y/o and he'll sock you.
They can protect themselves.
If it's a woman, she is, at 16, no less capable than at 30.
She knows martial arts or doesn't.

skinner Wisconsin
12/08/17 11:12 pm

Yes, it's wrong to take advantage of young girls and there is a huge power differential that makes these relationships inherently immoral.

skinner Wisconsin
12/08/17 11:25 pm

No, I've always believed this.

HammeringMan Gods Away On Business
12/09/17 12:05 am

M is a dear friend.
She enjoyed a 62 year marriage to a man who was 30 when they met. She was 15.

Maybe she was miserable the whole time!!!


Praetorianus Fair enough.
12/09/17 12:15 am

Ha! Hammer, great example!

HammeringMan Gods Away On Business
12/09/17 12:40 am

Thanks. Lots more personal stories. Love, romance, sex, and lust rarely respect social discretion in the bedroom. It's just in polite company that either the Lies or stories are told.

DecayedState Putting the W in SJW
12/08/17 11:03 pm

Seriously, what the actual fuck is wrong with you if you said it's ok?

Praetorianus Fair enough.
12/08/17 11:27 pm

Why wouldn't it be?
Both are over the age of consent and may date so how narrow is your mind? And what's the problem?

DecayedState Putting the W in SJW
12/08/17 11:30 pm

I don't know how many 16 year olds you've been around lately but it would be incredibly fucked up for a 30 year old to try to date one. 16 year olds are not mentally or physically done developing yet. Given how the 16 year old mind works there would be no way that a 30 year old would not be manipulative in a romantic situation. It'd still be creepy if it was an 18 year old as well but shit at 16 they are in 9th or 10th grade.

Praetorianus Fair enough.
12/08/17 11:33 pm

A lot.
Fuck you.

ShakaBrah California
12/08/17 10:32 pm

No. Even if sexual consent is legal in their area, it's just dating, not necessarily sexual contact.

Praetorianus Fair enough.
12/08/17 10:47 pm

Exactly! I had a girlfriend at age 16. We just went out dating with her dog always present, went to the movies, were holding hands walking in the park but never had sex. Lasted 3 months, but seemed longer.
Sweet memories 😏

Praetorianus Fair enough.
12/08/17 10:30 pm

What's so bad about the question to downvote it?
I think it's an interesting topic.

HammeringMan Gods Away On Business
12/09/17 12:07 am

Salty Peeps downvote to express ...

Let's see

Who cares!

bower8899 ...
12/08/17 10:10 pm

The law doesn't determine morality.

That being said, maybe they love each other, but I'd be suspicious

ZaQ777 Pittsburgh
12/08/17 10:07 pm

Not inherently, but I'd be suspicious.

Liberty 4,032,064
12/08/17 10:00 pm

It’d depend upon the individuals in question. Whether or not it was legal would be completely and wholly irrelevant to the question of whether it was wrong.

Praetorianus Fair enough.
12/08/17 10:05 pm

I wish laws were tailored to fit the individual situation 😒

Praetorianus Fair enough.
12/08/17 9:59 pm

IMO, the age of consent determines when somebody is mature enough to have a sexual relationship.
The age of the partners (if both over aoc) shouldn't matter then.
No to ageism.

GodBLessAmerica Death to All
12/08/17 9:59 pm

Morally, it’s very wrong, but if that’s the age of consent they can still date.

HammeringMan Gods Away On Business
12/09/17 12:10 am

Several Biblical examples ... make me question if perhaps it's socially despicable to you but morally ok

Praetorianus Fair enough.
12/09/17 12:20 am

Mary was probably 14. Yes, the mother of Christ.