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swervin May 16th, 2017 5:34am

It is estimated that 35-40% of sexual assaults and rapes aren't reported. Do you think if these were reported that people would consider SA/Rape a more common occurrence and would try harder to prevent it? (Not that they aren't already but more).

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PointB Libertarian Centrist
05/16/17 6:42 pm

They don't need to try harder, they need to try better. Everything that is a nothing issue is rape/as nowadays yet real rape isn't even addressed sometimes.

kjs Minnesota
05/16/17 12:05 pm

Police usually don't believe rape victims. The only reason police believed me was because I was beaten and my throat was cut.

aj1545 Cat Lady
05/16/17 12:22 pm

Yep. Im so sorry. A girl in my support group wasnt allowed to go to trial since there was not enough evidence that her gang rape wasnt consensual. Her cervix was bruised and she needed vaginal stitches. What hope is there for those of us with less extreme injuries?

kjs Minnesota
05/16/17 12:37 pm

Probably none which is beyond wrong. No one really cares except those of us it happened too and the families and friends. As far as I am concerned the rapist should be strung up and give the person a rusty razor blade and start from the bottom up.

aj1545 Cat Lady
05/16/17 12:57 pm

Ugh sadly its true. Its exactly why I didnt bother reporting. Any of my milder injuries would be deemed "shes a whore and wanted it." And its so true. My dad, bf at the time, bff all care deeply after being with me through the healing process, realizing how unlikely justice is. But it takes personal experience and it fucking shouldnt.

aj1545 Cat Lady
05/16/17 12:59 pm

And revenge fantasies were part of my therapy actually. Id be happy to hear about any harm coming to him, fantasize about pulling a lisbeth salander (revenge in girl w the dragon tattoo). Also part of why a dragon is incorporated into my tattoo.

kjs Minnesota
05/16/17 1:02 pm

If a man was raped and beaten it would become national news and something would be done immediately. But girls and women not so much. I was lucky enough years later to get my revenge against him as he was our neighbor and I babysat for his kids. It was a wonderful day in the neighborhood

swervin Maryland
05/16/17 2:03 pm

If more were reported, do you think, for lack of better terms, "more would believe it"? That's the question at hand here.

kjs Minnesota
05/16/17 2:15 pm

Yes. Most girls and women who are raped are also beaten and if the police were more informed about rape they might take it more seriously. In my case, there was a lawyer who thought he could threaten me with my dads insurance company & he was right. My father believed me my mother told me I was at fault. How can a 14 yr old be at fault. When I was married and had my twins I was at a dept. store and saw him. Scared me to death. I got the courage from somewhere to walk by him without acknowledging him but he said to me "somebody actually got u pregnant" I said I was married and he laughed and tried to touch the babies. I absolutely went ballistic and yelled at him to get away from my babies. A clerk was watching and knew something was wrong and asked if I wanted the police. I said yes. He of course said no. Police came and knew me thru my dads insurance agency and walked me to my car and said he would take care of him. I never saw him again. Hope he is in HELL.

BlueOctopus Merica
05/16/17 9:49 am

How can you determine that 35-40% of rapes aren't reported? 😆

BlueOctopus Merica
05/16/17 9:50 am

And by rape I mean sexual assault

aj1545 Cat Lady
05/16/17 12:20 pm

Same you determime everything else like that, surveys. Sone sociological research methodology might be good to read about, this stuff isnt pulled from thin air.

FacePalm That Trick Never Works
05/16/17 7:20 am

They are not going to be reported more often until the victims are believed more often. Rape is one of a very few crimes in which the victim's story is often questioned, and there is the suggestion that he or she "asked for it".

swervin Maryland
05/16/17 2:05 pm

But if more were reported, do you think they would be forced to believe it was occurring more often? I know this is a sensitive topic but it should be discussed in an open and frank manner.

Finny Conservative Lesbian
05/16/17 4:19 am

I believe these moreso are the issues:

- because of the stigma around men, there's some people who don't believe men can be raped; that oh why didn't you enjoy it?
- a lot of rapes are done my someone the person knows: family member, friend, boss, coworker, etc and reporting it may cause issues for them
- the process to collect evidence for rape can be invasive
- the trial may trigger dissociations and other symptoms of PTSD as they go through everything that presumably happened and pick it apart

aj1545 Cat Lady
05/16/17 6:32 am

And to add, a conviction is unlikely, so many, myself included decide it isnt worth it.

Suzan Hawaii
05/16/17 12:52 am

Unfortunately the victim is put through a lot of trouble

swervin Maryland
05/16/17 1:13 am

Yes, that's part of the reason so many are unreported.

aj1545 Cat Lady
05/16/17 1:00 pm

And odds are for nothing. Wed go through a lot more if there was a chance in hell of conviction or at least not being harassed.