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AnnaRose July 1st, 2013 3:01am

A five year old is diagnosed with terminal cancer and its spreading. He can't move the muscles near his hips or move without a walker. His birthday is nearby and he isn't expected to make it until then. He thinks its normal. Should he know hes dying?

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mtbRIDER Gone riding...
07/02/13 11:31 pm

Just reading that question tugged at my heart... Doesn't help that I have three young children though. I could personally make a case for both answers, but I just hope that I will never have to. :(

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kateXcore Dark side of the moon
07/01/13 3:06 pm

He should know. And let him celebrate his birthday early. It'll be fun for him. It'd be good for him to be happy as he's nearing the end.

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FrozenPhoton Behind the Shadows
07/01/13 12:45 pm

You do know that there is a new treatment for cancer that is almost a cure.
Still, he should know...

TopsQueen Oregon Coast
07/01/13 9:19 am

I take care of a little boy who will be six in August. Unless he's been totally isolated all his life this child is aware things are going on he's probably aware that he is deteriorating. Your family is on my heart b

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AnnaRose Texas
07/01/13 9:42 am

Thank you and it's my boyfriend's family though but still thank you

TopsQueen Oregon Coast
07/01/13 9:47 am

I remember you posting earlier about it was still in the diagnostic stage. You are wonderful young woman to care so deeply. I would definitely contact Make-A-Wish and there should be social services at the hospital. The song "All Through the Night".

TopsQueen Oregon Coast
07/01/13 9:48 am

Is actually a death watch song written a couple of centuries ago. It's heartbreaking but the words are beautiful if you can look it up online and find all the words to the song. Let your boyfriend know it's okay for men to cry.

AnnaRose Texas
07/01/13 9:50 am

No they've known he's had it for quite a while, but he just told me about it the other week. His birthday is on the sixth and they don't think he'll make it that long.. And thank you I'll look it up and I keep telling him it's ok to be sad, cry, etc.

TopsQueen Oregon Coast
07/01/13 9:53 am

I just googled the words lyrics to the song all through the night. It's a beautiful song for someone losing a child. I did an obituary for a six-year-old a couple years ago. A sneaker wave got him. God's peace surround his family.

AnnaRose Texas
07/01/13 10:06 am

It took me a few tries to find it but I think I did. If I found the right one, it's a beautiful song. And you wrote obituaries?

TopsQueen Oregon Coast
07/01/13 9:28 pm

A friends six sure old grandson was washed away by a sneakaway as well as her son-in-law. I did the obituaries.

love4life wonderland
06/30/13 10:40 pm

Congratulations.... You won depressing question of the day :p

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TopsQueen Oregon Coast
07/01/13 9:48 am

This is something that's really going on and this woman needed to share this.

TopsQueen Oregon Coast
06/30/13 9:46 pm

Has the family contacted Make-A-Wish?

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JennaF sunflower state of mind
06/30/13 10:10 pm

That's a great idea.

AnnaRose Texas
07/01/13 9:41 am

I'm not sure. I'll ask but as far as I know they haven't.

musicfreak Loving Life
06/30/13 9:38 pm

Annarose, if this is something you are actually going through I am so sorry. I don't know what I would do.

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musicfreak Loving Life
06/30/13 10:05 pm

He will be in my prayers tonight

true Home
06/30/13 9:02 pm

If he doesnt have long left, then i would just let him be a little boy and have no worries. Talk to him a little about it, but for the most part you wouldnt want to upset him by trying to explain.

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GetEduc8d learning more everyday
06/30/13 9:02 pm

If he thinks he's normal no reason to stress him out over it. I'm so sorry if this is a real situation. :-(

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GetEduc8d learning more everyday
06/30/13 9:05 pm

Answer any questions he might have honestly & matter of fact. He'll figure it out at some point. You can also ask him open ended questions to gauge his understanding of the situation. Things like "Can you describe what your body's going through?"

MrLucchese If curious, ask.
06/30/13 8:18 pm

I would say, no. He wouldn't be able to comprehend the full meaning of such, so it would either not mean anything to him, or he wouldn't be able to rationalize it.

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AnnaRose Texas
06/30/13 8:16 pm

I really see how both can be good and bad but it's a semi-fragile situation in my eyes

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TopsQueen Oregon Coast
06/30/13 8:13 pm

I would say yes let him talk. Allow him to bring it up but let him talk about his feelings and fears. A lot times people know when they're dying.

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AnnaRose Texas
06/30/13 8:15 pm

He doesn't. He thinks every five year old is like this.

JennaF sunflower state of mind
06/30/13 9:41 pm

Is this really happening to someone you know? I can't even imagine. I am so sorry.

TopsQueen Oregon Coast
06/30/13 9:43 pm

It's the one with a birthday coming up? I would talk to him you should have a grief consular because kids know a lot more than they're letting on. He might be protecting somebody else. If he's on the cancer ward he's probably heard some things.

TopsQueen Oregon Coast
06/30/13 9:44 pm

I talked with a four-year-old whose mother had died in front of her. One of the things I said was that my little girl's first mama died. The little girl had been really hunched over. When I talked about that she breathed in and straightened up.

TopsQueen Oregon Coast
06/30/13 9:44 pm

She asked me that this happened to another little girl whose mama died. I told her yes she was so relieved to know she was not alone. It was so sudden unexpected heart failure.

AnnaRose Texas
07/01/13 9:46 am

Syrian, yes it's happening to my boyfriends cousin. He was at the hospital last night and told me that he couldn't bear to tell him.
And Tops yes it's the one with the birthday. But we can try talking to him thank you

JennaF sunflower state of mind
07/01/13 10:05 am

That's the most tragic thing I've ever heard. I hope he gets better.

AnnaRose Texas
07/01/13 10:09 am

I hope so too but as I told my boyfriends last night, he'll get better, it just may not in the way that we want him to. He'll be happy and healthy in heaven again though if not. It would be a miracle if he did get better it seems like right now.

JennaF sunflower state of mind
07/01/13 10:16 am

That's true. The poor kid is suffering in this world. Heaven is a much better reward.

Kris Humidity Central
06/30/13 8:05 pm

Let him live it out, thinking its normal. Let him die happy.

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AnnaRose Texas
06/30/13 8:14 pm

But what if he figures it out as he's dying and the last moments he's upset at his family?

true Home
06/30/13 9:05 pm

I doubt he will. In the last moment he probably wont even know whats happening around him honey. Im sorry if you are going through this.