Show of HandsShow of Hands

RJ1969 July 26th, 2015 11:45pm

Is this the craziest news article you've ever read or have you seen better?

15 Liked

Comments: Add Comment

nicnerd
07/28/15 5:47 pm

It would help if the article were at least real, the website is satire, not real news.

susanr Colorado
07/27/15 6:05 pm

It's right up there with the craziest. Too bad it's fakety-fake-fake. m.snopes.com/cow-eyeballs-in-dui/

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Handstand .
07/27/15 1:56 pm

He's strange. That's not where I keep my cow eyeballs.

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timeout Boston Strong
07/27/15 12:31 pm

Is this guy related to Hannibal Lecter...too crazy.

suppressedID That is my secret Cap
07/27/15 8:29 am

Just goes to show that if I can think of it, it's not "out there".

I could NEVER come up with this.

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Rosebud Ohio
07/27/15 7:32 am

He ATE the anal balls????

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jlong105 Indiana
07/27/15 1:06 pm

To help with his erectile dysfunction.

cowboy Doors of Perception
07/27/15 6:54 am

Don't do drugs, kids.

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FATSHADOW Cyborg Gorilla
07/27/15 6:31 am

You will find worse in any local Florida paper, any day of the year.

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evoecon nearest binary system
07/27/15 5:09 am

Where did he get drunk, whilst filled with eyes? Who does a police officer 'pat down' a suspect to find evidence concealed in a "colon"?

Ders13 Minnesota
07/26/15 11:50 pm

If you want real crazy news articles, check this subreddit out www.reddit.com/r/nottheonion

Liberatheist Mustafar
07/26/15 11:19 pm

Disclaimer: Not everyone in Wyoming does this

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AmericanWolf For the Benefit of All
07/26/15 8:17 pm

The Onion couldn't make this up.

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alkie New York
07/26/15 8:10 pm

They’re beneficial for erectile dysfunction, which I currently battle, but I also just like the texture and taste.

LOL wtf!!!!

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thelowend imitation is flattery
07/26/15 8:15 pm

best quote. possibly ever.

Rosebud Ohio
07/27/15 7:33 am

The texture and taste after he pulls them out of his ass....
Now I really need a vomit emoji!

thelowend imitation is flattery
07/27/15 3:56 pm

rota!!! ugh!!!

I'm SURE they are only covered with finest of excrement... :)

kennabenena life is a blonde moment
07/26/15 8:09 pm

😧 My face the whole time... No laughing, no nothing, just 😧

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alkie New York
07/26/15 8:10 pm

I laughed at some of the guys quotes. It's so crazy

kennabenena life is a blonde moment
07/26/15 8:11 pm

I'm now laughing thinking about eyeballs rolling out of his pants 😂

alkie New York
07/26/15 8:17 pm

Hey, what just fell out of your pants?
Oh that? Just some eyeballs..
👀

kennabenena life is a blonde moment
07/26/15 8:18 pm

"Stop looking at my butt" 😂

Whichendisup uniquely unoriginal
07/26/15 8:07 pm

OH MY GOOD GRAVY BATMAN!!!
I was laughing so hard I almost couldn't forward it to mr.which.

I just can't even... there are no words...
😞😂

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EarlyBird Portland
07/26/15 8:03 pm

Haha! Wow! Can't wait to share this with my parents in the morning 😂👍

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RoDe Latinus wordsus
07/26/15 7:30 pm

Haha woow. But I'm sorry, if you're willing to shove cow eye balls up your butt, rather than throwing away them into a landfill, you just shouldn't be charged with the theft.

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RoDe Latinus wordsus
07/26/15 7:32 pm

30 though? It's like that parable of the gremlin who couldn't get his hand out of the jar because he took to much from it making his fist too big.
There's so much craziness in this story.

RoDe Latinus wordsus
07/26/15 8:19 pm

They haven't heard back from the company when the article was written. I'm hoping the company realizes the public humiliation of having that circulate the Internet is enough to not charge him with theft. Maybe work out a deal where he could buy the

RoDe Latinus wordsus
07/26/15 8:21 pm

eye balls instead of shoving them up his butt. Haha this just blows my mind. I love people. This just affirms that whole life is stranger than fiction notion. It's like, you couldn't have made this guy up if you'd have tried.

Rainey 633 Stag Trail Road
07/26/15 7:03 pm

I tried to tell my husband, but I couldn't stop laughing 😂😂

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duey in a fools paradise
07/26/15 6:58 pm

Where does everyone else keep their cows eyeballs?

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KAnne Atlantic City, NJ
07/26/15 6:50 pm

Mm cow eyes stewed in the colon. Such a flavorful soup. Crème de la crème.

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Laserbeam Crazy bird lady
07/26/15 6:43 pm

That just made my day

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missmorganmarie ...
07/26/15 5:49 pm

😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨

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ronderman North Carolina
07/26/15 5:48 pm

Seriously, who HASN'T had 30 eyeballs up their butt???

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EnderWiggin So disillusioned...
07/26/15 5:33 pm

Meh. (Well, it was up there but..)

Some if the shít that goes down in Florida...

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jimiscott Survivor
07/26/15 4:52 pm

I don't like my beef with frumundacheese. Good grief!

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thelowend imitation is flattery
07/26/15 4:48 pm

there's a joke somewhere here about a colonoscopy...I'm just not witty enough to make it...

longhorn? where are you? this is right up your alley

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Wert A picture of my junk
07/26/15 4:57 pm

I think you just made it... LOL