Should people aspire to life-long monogamy? (UserQ)
I envy people who say they found their soulmate..or someone who's their best friend..My sister has been married for 30 years (holy SHIT time flies) and my mom once asked her hersecret..she said one word.."Comprimise"
it would be a lonely life growing old without someone of vital significance by your side.. your casual daters won't be by your side in the face of hardship... monogamy makes sense for most especially when having children.
I agree with GingerRed
What a massive blanket statement. Monogamy is good for a lot of people, but it certainly is not for others. There is no one way of having relationships that is superior to another. So many people assuming they know what's best for others...
Monogamy in general, and marriage in particular, is beautiful when it's engaged in whole-heartedly by both man and wife without thought of 'what if?'. If you leave yourself no other options, you will achieve it.
In a bad way....you know what I mean..you gang banger you. Haten everybody.
I'm ashamed you care, and that other peoples opinions matter to you.
I'll say yes, but perhaps not until after 40. :-)
I'm ashamed of males right now...
Yes. I did but I failed. Hoping third time is a charm lol.
Pretty impossible for like 80% of males.
There are a few of us that don't cheat!
I'm not religious, but life-long monogamy is the only thing that makes sense to me. If I'm busy setting aside resources for a presumed future breakup, I'm not investing in my current relationship, which makes it less efficient. If I plan to be with my husband until I die, I can make long-term plans
To each their own! If you marry someone you really should try to invest in the relationship. It's a waste of money otherwise.
@heatherluvs: Kids are nurtured by the health of the primary family relationship, which is between the two committed parents. No healthy primary relationship = deprived kids, and they will know it when they go to school and see what the other kids have.
You aspire to do what you want to do, not what others say you should do
IF you marry of course you should aspire to stay together unless you want to change the vows from till death do you part to till I've had enough.
I think it means that once you settle down you try to stay married for life not that you may not sow your wild oats and experiment in your youth.
Oh wait, does the question imply being with only one person for your entire (adult) life? If that's the case, I'd definitely change my answer to no,
Not necessarily, but generally yes. If you and your partner(s) are fine with monogam-ish or poly relationships, that's fine too. I just voted yes because I'm against cheating when a couple has agreed to be monogamous.
Although I generally agree with life-long monogamy, if you really don't think it's for you, then so be it.
As a consolation, you can miss out but not miss what you never come to know. A virgin who marries a bad lover and stays faithful for life no more misses hot sex than an ancient Roman missed TV.
You miss out if you only get with one person. Your lifelong partner could be horrible in the sack but you won't know any better, you will just think sex is whatever your entire life. I don't know how many partners I have had. Std free too. People are brainwashed by the science fiction book the bible
"I’m the newcomer to the campaign, so let me share a first impression. I have never seen opponents so silent about their record, and so desperate to keep their power.
They’ve run out of ideas. Their moment came and went. Fear and division are all they’ve got left." Paul Ryan
Some animals, especially birds, ARE monogamous.
"What did the taxpayers get out of the Obama stimulus? More debt. That money wasn’t just spent and wasted – it was borrowed, spent, and wasted." Paul Ryan
I expect my partner to be monogamous. Other than that, I don't care. I'm not the one to judge... that's someone else's job.
Religiously and culturally up to you, you have your rights...like saying should I, as a united states citizen, aspire to always see fireworks on independence day..
Grocker, If you grew up that way you wouldn't know any different and you can't live your lofe for other people, even your children.
People who don't live together, have a longer courtship/engagement, seek the approval of their community and family in evaluating their potential partner- these people stay married.
People who break those rules are more likely to get divorced.
Marriage works. People just don't do it right.
People should do as they please. Why do I care.
People are bashing marriage so much. But they also don't acknowledge that people today break many of the long standing rules of entering into marriage.
It's well known that little to no courtship or engagement before marriage and living together before marriage result in higher divorce rates.
Gunfighter- don't forget about clothes. Animals don't wear clothes, except for circus animals, but that can't really count.
And the fact that we cook our food.
And written language.
Oh, and religion.
And that we aren't afraid of vacuum cleaners.
And people don't turn down free money.
Personally, I wouldn't marry - I consider myself eccentric and a loner. Not to be confused with lonely but it doesn't go well with marriage.
@magdalene : that's why one shouldn't marry hastily. A good time of engagement is in order and no making babies which might people feel obliged to marry. However, this is a point where I accept all other lifestyles, it's just what I think is best esp with kids.
We're not animals. Monogamy is the only thing that seperates us from the animals.
Grocker has the best answer. Well said.
Disregarding religious beliefs for whomever, what's wrong with polygamy?
Adultery is painful. Don't want to be monogamous? Don't commit to someone.
If that is what they are called to! Of course, nobody is called to adultery ;) but the single life is where some belong.
People should aspire to live happy, fulfilling lives and if that includes monogamy, that's great.
I hope to God never to marry anyone who thinks otherwise.
Whoa! I think I just remembered that i love Dr. Condi Rice! And now Susana Martinez Governor of New Mexico!
People should aspire to whatever they want to. That's not for me to say.
Only if they have children
@Grocker Well said!
I see no reason to look elsewhere. 25 years and still looped.
Polygamy is ok. I couldn't do it but others can. And I don't look for life long relationships. No point in it. It depends on the person and situation.
lucky if that is their hearts desire...