Show of HandsShow of Hands

SalingerTwain3 March 13th, 2015 4:58am

I'm bisexual and have not told my family. There is no LGBT people in my family(extended include).They often say what I consider anti-gay statements "Gays should be able to raise children because they will think it's ok." How do I tell them the truth?

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ozzy
03/14/15 6:55 am

You never know. They may be supportive, or they may give you good advice. Dont devalue others on speculation. You are probably too young to really know what you are.

shnibbydawhale Nihilist
03/13/15 7:04 pm

I'm literally in the exact same boat. I hope it goes well for you when you do tell them. I'm anxious to see how it goes. Keep us updated!

smarttexan More Moderate Than U
03/13/15 4:36 am

Why do you need to tell them? In a relationship?

SalingerTwain3 The cage bird sings
03/13/15 11:30 am

No, but it does make it somewhat difficult to be in one. My aunt thought a guy was hitting on me and we'll it didn't go well to say the least. I was somewhat interested but *sigh* oh well.

bringstheeagle Colorado
03/12/15 10:43 pm

I'm thinking why is it their business.

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SalingerTwain3 The cage bird sings
03/13/15 11:34 am

Mom's words:
Because I'm 17 and thus still a child. A child has no business and any business I have is her business as well.

As long as I live in her house, I have to follow her rules.

bringstheeagle Colorado
03/13/15 2:06 pm

You can do that without tellingly her everything- as obviously you already do.

Maelthus
03/15/15 9:30 am

Yeah, that's nonsense, you have your life, regardless of being a child, you're allowed your privacy just like they are, if you're breaking the law, or something and they catch you that's different, but they don't have the right to your thoughts.

Maelthus
03/15/15 9:33 am

Your feelings, emotions, beliefs, values, etc., those are yours and yours alone, and you can choose who to share them with.
I don't know how you should tell your parents, or even if you should.
Are they very religious?
Are they very right wing?

Maelthus
03/15/15 9:35 am

Do they think that LGBT, is a choice, or a "lifestyle"?
These will all make a big difference in when, how, or if, you should tell them.

SalingerTwain3 The cage bird sings
03/12/15 10:34 pm

A civil war I don't want to be in the middle of. Once I had a "friend" who was angry about me being bi. Though he did tell anyone at school.

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SalingerTwain3 The cage bird sings
03/12/15 10:37 pm

Meant this as I reply to citethesource

citethesource Socialist and Atheist
03/12/15 10:04 pm

May I ask how old you are? I only ask because in this circumstance it is important in regards to my answer.

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SalingerTwain3 The cage bird sings
03/12/15 10:13 pm

Be 18 in August and a Senior.

citethesource Socialist and Atheist
03/12/15 10:17 pm

You have reason to possibly fear they may not react well?

SalingerTwain3 The cage bird sings
03/12/15 10:31 pm

I fear certain family members rejecting me. Some would be okay with it.(I think) I just don't want my family, who I came to love to reject me.b(this may cause a civil war within my family)

SalingerTwain3 The cage bird sings
03/12/15 11:04 pm

A civil war I don't want to be in the middle of. Once I had a "friend" who was angry about me being bi. Though he didn't tell anyone at school.

Ru12bseen Ignoring the Ignorant
03/13/15 4:56 am

Seems to me that what you do in your "private time" isn't really any of their concern. If, though, you decided to start dating someone of your own gender and were going to bring them around, it may be nice to sit and have a talk with them.

citethesource Socialist and Atheist
03/13/15 5:14 am

For now, I'd recommend staying quiet.

Once you are financially independent and outside of their control, go for it. But, right now, they can do too much damage should they react poorly.

Ru12bseen Ignoring the Ignorant
03/13/15 5:35 am

@cite: good point.

SalingerTwain3 The cage bird sings
03/13/15 11:47 am

So I have to go another few years of ignoring their comments and pretending not to be offended.

Ru12bseen Ignoring the Ignorant
03/13/15 11:48 am

Well... Do you think they've a mind to be understanding and accepting? If not, then saying something won't make it better. It may make it worse.

Ru12bseen Ignoring the Ignorant
03/13/15 11:49 am

Not to mention, and I don't mean to diminish the issue, but you're young. Give this whole thing time to breathe and age. Let's see what things are like in five years. Who knows? Right?

citethesource Socialist and Atheist
03/13/15 2:36 pm

Sadly, Alex, yes. There's no mitigating how demoralizing, insulting, and degrading this is, but the options on the other side can actually be much worse. If I recall correctly, about 40% of homeless youth are LGBT.

Being in Texas, there is not much

citethesource Socialist and Atheist
03/13/15 2:38 pm

...out there as far as protections go.

When you can support yourself financially, drop the bomb and walk away. They are not entitled to your time or attention. The price they then pay for having you in their lives is their silence.