Show of HandsShow of Hands

TopsQueen November 5th, 2014 3:46am

Last night a local woman threw her severely autistic six-year-old son off a bridge. Do you think they should have respite care for people where they do not fear losing their children just so they can have a break?

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mac Oregon
11/06/14 7:52 am

Very sad story

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Ernest Make it so
11/05/14 7:08 pm

What about a supportive husband?

TopsQueen Oregon Coast
11/06/14 10:45 pm

He's confined to bed with MS no income coming in.

s4mm1 MD SLP
11/05/14 2:38 pm

I don't know what's worse, what this disgusting thing did to her child or people are sick enough to defend it. I've worked extensively with autisim and its hard. I understand that. That is no excuse to murder your son. Ever.

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2katz I live in Nebraska
11/05/14 2:28 pm

I applaud respite care. It's available in many ways. Do it does exist. Are you asking if it should be provided or guaranteed by government? Then no.

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nnifer Alpha Quadrant
11/05/14 12:00 pm

Until you have raised a severely autistic child, do not judge. I have Aspergers, so does my son. Severe autism is unimaginably difficult--even for the best mother.

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TopsQueen Oregon Coast
11/05/14 12:11 pm

I agree. I have compassion for that mother. I wish there had been resources for her or if she had been aware.

nnifer Alpha Quadrant
11/05/14 12:21 pm

I put myself through college working as a direct care staff at a group home for disabled adults. It was hard, but at the end of my shift, I could go home. Don't judge anyone until you've walked in their shoes.

pateach2 love my son
11/05/14 6:45 am

Here's my thing, she probably shouldn't have the child in the first place. I truly believe that there needs to be some sort of testing to be able to reproduce. This is so sad.

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TopsQueen Oregon Coast
11/05/14 9:16 am

I agree with you. And I felt that way for a long time. I would imagine this child since more than she could handle.

jvc1133 61535
11/05/14 6:43 am

I do not understand this, to me it's murder.

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TopsQueen Oregon Coast
11/05/14 9:16 am

That's what she's being charged with. I would imagine she severely depressed and reached her breaking point.

GlockMan1 Alabama
11/05/14 6:21 am

Where are her parents? Her husband? Her church? Almost every church offers a MOTHERS DAY OUT....where they will watch your kids while you run errands or take a break.

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TopsQueen Oregon Coast
11/05/14 9:16 am

I don't know that. It sounds like she might've been along with the severely disabled child.

karion Illinois
11/05/14 2:16 pm

Her husband developed MS and within two weeks they had no income and she was a full time caregiver to the autistic son and her husband. And that was not the only child they had. That's a state none of us would want to find ourselves in.

ozzy
11/05/14 5:10 am

They do

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MrMilkdud
11/05/14 1:56 am

They already do have services like that, TQ. I used to volunteer at one. Some cost money, but most are covered by insurance or are free to families and paid for by private foundations or churches.

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MrMilkdud
11/05/14 2:00 am

People don't lose custody of their kids for enlisting support services. It's possible that she had the option of giving up custody so she didn't have a financial liability, but that's usually not the only option for destitute parents.

kougrakub
11/04/14 11:17 pm

No. Those people are not parents, they do not deserve their children.

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kermie gaytopia
11/04/14 11:18 pm

Heaven forbid everyone not be as perfect as you.

kougrakub
11/04/14 11:22 pm

Huh?

Praetorianus Fair enough.
11/04/14 11:39 pm

You don't have to be perfect to NOT murder your children, kermie, what have you been smoking?

pateach2 love my son
11/05/14 6:44 am

I agree with Andy. This woman is not a parent, at all!

nnifer Alpha Quadrant
11/05/14 12:48 pm

Do your children eat feces out of the toilet if left unsupervised for one minute? Do your kids self mutilate by ripping at their genitals? Does your child bite you? Are you able to hold a conversation with your kids? Don't judge anyone.

jmw7477 Indiana
11/04/14 10:44 pm

You chose to have the child. If you need to have a break, find a babysitter.

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TopsQueen Oregon Coast
11/05/14 9:18 am

Sometimes when a child is severely autistic they are very hard to be around and it could be impossible to get a babysitter.

jmw7477 Indiana
11/05/14 9:31 am

I understand. However, the parent is the parent and the child is their responsibility.

nnifer Alpha Quadrant
11/05/14 12:51 pm

My son, who is barely on the spectrum, potty trained at age 7. He would throw up if I tried to leave him with a babysitter. my sister refused to babysit. He was a breeze compared to most autistic children. Don't talk about what you don't understand.

nnifer Alpha Quadrant
11/05/14 12:53 pm

My son is in college now. He seems normal. He is brilliant and a sweet person. It was hard to get here.

jmw7477 Indiana
11/05/14 12:56 pm

It doesn't matter the issue the child has. They're the parents' responsibility. I'm including everything in this -- from autistic behavior to just plain bad decisions. You chose to have the child. That child is your responsibility.

nnifer Alpha Quadrant
11/05/14 1:00 pm

It must be wonderful to live in a perfect world as you do. This woman had a mental breakdown. I hope you never find yourself in her shoes. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.

jmw7477 Indiana
11/05/14 1:03 pm

My world is far from perfect, but I get tired of people choosing to have kids (when they probably shouldn't) and then choosing to not take care of them.

nnifer Alpha Quadrant
11/05/14 1:19 pm

Do you know any severely autistic children? My son is very mild, and that was extremely tough, and I'm a psychologist. Nothing can prepare a parent for that. Plus her husband recently became disabled. Don't judge people.

kougrakub
11/05/14 1:26 pm

Hey nifer, if he's that much of a problem, put him up for adoption. Don't want to give him away? Accept that fact and love him like you should and simply clean up after him.

kougrakub
11/05/14 1:27 pm

Like you should, and do*

nnifer Alpha Quadrant
11/05/14 1:31 pm

As a psychologist, I understand people having a mental breakdown. This is a tragic story. A rational person would've acted differently. I don't judge though. Rather, I sympathize.

TopsQueen Oregon Coast
11/05/14 2:38 pm

Nifer. I have such compassion for that woman my heart is broken for her it's nice to see somebody else feels that way also. I cannot imagine the stress she was. Doesn't make what she did was right but it's heartbreaking. Your son gives me hope for my

TopsQueen Oregon Coast
11/05/14 2:39 pm

He is 2 1/2 and basically nonverbal. He was slow to walk into many other motor skills. He gives hugs and kisses and laughs. They discovered wheat makes him sick. And he's a total grandma's boy.

jmw7477 Indiana
11/05/14 2:45 pm

I know it's hard. But when you agree to become a parent, it's a full time job. You agree to everything. If you can't take care of them, find someone who will.

nnifer Alpha Quadrant
11/05/14 7:02 pm

Topsqueen, early intervention works miracles. If you met my son you would just think he is a little quirky and odd. So am I. My son and I think of Aspergers as a gift. He is brilliant and an engineering student.

opie99 left coast best coast
11/04/14 10:19 pm

She was under a lot of pressure. She has a recently disabled husband, and a slew of mental issues. Not having an "out" is not a reason to murder your child.

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Praetorianus Fair enough.
11/04/14 9:54 pm

Never heard of respite care, but I suggest supervised assisted living facilities for both parent and child where the parent can't cope or has mental issues.

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LadyBug237 Florida
11/04/14 9:40 pm

This problem is so heartbreaking.

NotHomeYet formerly fgw0369
11/04/14 9:02 pm

Love the idea of it! Who pays? Will it raise taxes? If so, can budgets be tweaked? What will folks be willing to give up to afford this benefit? Can it be under health ins?

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TopsQueen Oregon Coast
11/04/14 9:09 pm

I don't know. Maybe churches. She apparently reached the breaking point. Turned herself in afterward. Single mom. Severely disabled son.

NotHomeYet formerly fgw0369
11/04/14 9:21 pm

Breaks my heart. My neighbor has a severely handicapped son. They have nurses that come in so she can run to the store, etc. Good health ins. is critical.

PrincessPetal Austin, TX
11/04/14 9:43 pm

Last year I volunteered at this place called FEAT of WA. It's a place where parents can drop of their autistic kids for a few hours to get a little break or run errands. Great program and learning experience. I wish they will expand it more.