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Rainey June 11th, 2014 8:33pm

You've caught your 12 yr old son stealing money from your wallet several times and gone over with him how bad it is to steal. One day he gets caught stealing from a store and is taken in juvenile hall, do you let him stay overnight or pick him up?

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Injectable Trump Killed Babbitt
06/13/14 9:05 am

Home punishment followed up by a trip to a therapist. Jail never helped a 12yr. old.

06/13/14 4:55 am

He stays. It's a hard to do and causes a sleepless night for everybody involved but he must stay. When we asked our son about his path in life he replied, " I've only been arrested twice". (Ears melt off head)

Rosebud Ohio
06/13/14 8:11 am

Haha. Did you not know about them at the time?
(I only laugh because I know how much the ordeal sucks as a friend or family, and that comment is kinda great)

06/13/14 10:01 am

Oh yeah, we knew. He eventually straighten out. Met a girl from Fargo on the internet, we paid for a one way ticket and told him he would be welcomed home but he would have to buy his own ticket back. He married and has 2 children.

Rosebud Ohio
06/13/14 10:08 am

Good for him :)

Torfin Never Behind
06/13/14 2:25 am

His punishment from me will be far worse than the courts will meet out. (I've dealt with this before)

thursday Kansas
06/12/14 10:46 pm

I think it would really depend on the kid. Of I suspect that there is a bigger underlying problem or know of some trauma then I'm more likely to seek the help of a therapist than a guard. But if he's just a brat, I might let him sweat it out.

professorwho Madness and Genius
06/12/14 10:24 pm

Little shit needs to learn his lesson. Then when gets home, I'm going all police interrogation on him.

JDoe Its a gift
06/12/14 9:10 pm

My first concern is "what is he stealing money from me to pay for?". That should be a bigger concern than some silly scared straight parenting game. There's a problem an I need to work with him to fix it.

Ivyra Earth
06/12/14 8:43 pm

I went through a bit of a stealing phase when I was 8. I don't think that would really help.

tdyakker lost
06/12/14 8:05 pm

Play stupid games, win stupid prizes!

06/12/14 7:29 pm

He is 12, just getting picked up and taken there should be enough to scare him. If not he is destined for real big trouble.

singkitty In the cloud
06/12/14 7:28 pm

That rugrat clearly isn't getting the point at home, so they can think it over a night in juvenile. I'd also figure some form of punishment to fit the crime. Most likely volunteer work of some form.

RossDMands Miami Township, OH
06/12/14 5:57 pm

I can be much more frightening than anything he could encounter in juvenile detention. For that matter, I can be more frightening than anything Guantanamo Bay could dish out. I'd pick him up.

KingRodney Enjoy the Decline
06/12/14 6:56 am

I'd leave him there for a month. That ought to put him in his place.

jestana My Minds Eye
06/11/14 11:22 pm

Pick him up. Motivate him to get a job where $12 is child's play. Boys need lots of lessons. That is not parental failure. It is parental process. The state can provide no evidence Juvi works.

06/12/14 10:07 pm

He didn't steal $12, he's 12 years old. He could have stolen $100 dollars! Does that change your mind?

jestana My Minds Eye
06/13/14 6:58 am

$100 or $100,000- a 12 y/o is the responsibility of the parent. If the parent is past dealing then send the parent to parenting class not the kid to Juvi!

06/13/14 10:29 am

Even so, a 12 year old should know better than to steal.

jestana My Minds Eye
06/13/14 11:50 am

I have never said stealing was right. Even a penny or a cookie. My point is that it is a parental issue and NOT one for the Juvi

06/14/14 7:41 pm

They still need punishment. Obviously, whatever said parent has been doing isn't working, and more severe measures are required.

Rosebud Ohio
06/11/14 9:42 pm

Let him stay overnight. Having known a few in minim security places... a bit of exposure would be good for him. It's helped more than one person I know get back on track.

Zod Above Pugetropolis
06/11/14 8:16 pm

Why would I be in a big hurry to bail him out? He probably still owes me money too. It's way past time for him to learn there are consequences to bad behavior.

CTYankee!!! Connecticut
06/11/14 6:01 pm

Let him stay a week

jchristianreed South Carolina
06/11/14 5:26 pm

Better he spend a night in Juvi than a year in Prison!!!

FemmeAdamWest in the Tardis library
06/11/14 5:20 pm

I'm not sure if I would trust leaving him in overnight, but I would let him sit in there for a few hours, perhaps making him think I was leaving him there overnight.

calicosolo Wisconsin
06/11/14 5:15 pm

Stay. got to learn some how

TheMadScientist the mad laboratory
06/11/14 5:03 pm

Ah ha ha ha! What an idiot! I wonder how many meals I'll calculate he has to eat in there to "pay back" the money he has stolen from me.

Rob Be Safe Be Smart
06/11/14 3:21 pm

Obviously I've failed to get my point across, but that doesn't mean I'm going to let The System take a crack already. When he turns 18 & tries robbing a bank, he's going to have to pay the consequences. That, will be the next point when we get home.

smacc DunningKruger
06/11/14 9:29 pm

In this case the system only gets him overnight. Why not use that? You've failed so far. If what you're doing isn't working try something else.

singkitty In the cloud
06/12/14 7:31 pm

Clearly whatever you're doing at home isn't working, why not let them get a dose of reality now, so they aren't robbing banks when they're 18!

Rob Be Safe Be Smart
06/12/14 7:43 pm

You both may be right, but I'm still going to try one more time.

handshown The Midwest West Coast
06/12/14 7:45 pm

I like Rob's take.

Saying the parent is failing at 12 doesn't quite add up. Kids are bottles of surging hormones and can't think straight.

Does he need consequences? YES
A night stay? Not yet...

singkitty In the cloud
06/13/14 4:33 am

I think it depends on the child. Some would be scared enough just by getting caught, however in this situation they start at home and then move on to actually breaking the law. I don't think a simple punishment at home is going to do it for all kids

Rob Be Safe Be Smart
06/13/14 8:16 am

"It depends on the child.." has everything to do with the parent in the first place. I didn't say I would put them in time out, or send them to their room. If we've gotten to this point. The punishment will be anything but simple...

Rob Be Safe Be Smart
06/13/14 8:17 am

My mother used to call me for advise with my sisters. One was caught with a boy in her room and smoking pot when she was a freshmen in high school. My suggestion was to remove her door until further notice.

Rob Be Safe Be Smart
06/13/14 8:17 am

It worked well. I, and my ways, are never really simple.

singkitty In the cloud
06/13/14 10:55 am

My door got removed as a kid. It didn't stop me from not obeying, just taught me to be better at lying. What worked with my sister didn't work with me because we were different people. So yes it depends on the child. IMO.

singkitty In the cloud
06/13/14 10:59 am

Also removing a door hardly fits the offense here. Mine got taken simply for slamming it, this kid BROKE THE LAW! If I was the store owner and found out he got sent home and his door removed I'd be pretty upset.

rebelfury76 No Justice, No Peace
06/11/14 3:15 pm

I can parent my own kid. I don't need him in the hands of the State. Besides, then they just learn new shit to do from the other kids in there. All in all, no logical reason to let them stay there unless you're just a vindictive type.

Rainey 633 Stag Trail Road
06/11/14 8:55 pm

I completely agree with you.

GrandmaALiCE Rocky Mtns aerial view
06/12/14 5:54 pm

Rebel, I do understand your point. The problem is, the hypothetical parent in this question has *already* failed to get the point across. I answered "leave him." I wasn't thinking "vindictive," but accepting consequences of his actions.

singkitty In the cloud
06/12/14 7:33 pm

It's not vindictive. If the child is breaking the law and clearly not learning right from wrong at home "tough love" could very well teach them the hard lesson they need.

GrandmaALiCE Rocky Mtns aerial view
06/12/14 8:00 pm

Exactly. I struggled with the answer a bit and came to that conclusion.

rebelfury76 No Justice, No Peace
06/13/14 1:55 am

And congratulations your kid gets out learning a whole new slew of tips and tricks and also feels like his parents don't love him further alienating him and pushing him toward a life of gangs and crime. Well done.

rebelfury76 No Justice, No Peace
06/13/14 1:56 am

The consequences should be at home, not at the hands of the State.

singkitty In the cloud
06/13/14 4:20 am

And congratulations your kid now thinks they are above the law and mommy and daddy will just come bail them out if they do something wrong. That's a real positive message. Both have downsides. I really think it depends on the child.

singkitty In the cloud
06/13/14 4:23 am

If your child equates the punishment they receive for breaking the law as you not loving them, they have issues that reach beyond this. It's called tough love for a reason and some kids benefit more from it than others.

GrandmaALiCE Rocky Mtns aerial view
06/13/14 5:49 am

Rebel, I know you have some issues with law enforcement. As you said to me recently, some of the laws they enforce are immoral. It's a valid point. However, don't you think that theft is a legitimate area for law enforcement? Also, the kid ...

GrandmaALiCE Rocky Mtns aerial view
06/13/14 5:54 am

... in this question stole from a store, not from you. He committed the crime in the outside world, out of the home. This puts it outside the realm of simple parental discipline - especially, because the parent in the question has failed in the past.

bronwynn previously skittles360
06/11/14 2:47 pm

Stay overnight then pick him up first thing in the morning.

KatG Liberal in Ohio
06/11/14 2:44 pm

Oh, he's staying the night. Definitely.

smartfart Florida
06/11/14 2:08 pm

He'd like his stay at juvie much more than being at home with me after that.

knh85 ...
06/11/14 2:05 pm

If it's the first thing he's done, outside of stealing my money, I'd pick him up. If he has been in trouble before (caught by me or anyone else, outside of the home) he's spending the night.

presrvd Phoenix
06/11/14 1:44 pm

Having firsthand experience with juvenile detention centers, and his/her inability to heed warnings, maybe an overnight stay will help.

presrvd Phoenix
06/11/14 1:46 pm 'daughter' in the question. Pay attention, Presrvd!

2katz I live in Nebraska
06/11/14 2:20 pm

Stop picking on presrvd.

fredd TrumpLand
06/11/14 1:44 pm

Pick him up, but take pictures of the process and post them to his Facebook or whatever the kids are into.

Whichendisup uniquely unoriginal
06/11/14 3:47 pm

lmao! awesome, must remember this!

chickencookie Jihad Joe
06/11/14 1:43 pm

Come home, sit him down find out why and let him do something productive like volunteering to give more than take

Rainey 633 Stag Trail Road
06/11/14 2:19 pm

I like that idea

TopsQueen Oregon Coast
06/11/14 1:42 pm

Is where he's going to stay. My mother-in-law did the same thing to my husband. It gave him a wake up call

StilettoMiss SF med law, meme queen
06/11/14 1:35 pm

I'd pick him up because you never know what can happen overnight and I wouldn't want him to end up in a fistfight or worse