Show of HandsShow of Hands

JustBob February 3rd, 2014 1:09pm

You over hear your 15 yo son teasing his friend for attending church (or a different one that your son attends) calling him a freak, playfully, but clearly upsetting the other boy. Do you intervene and stop your son?

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IMO atoms, space, opinion
02/03/14 10:21 pm

I wouldn't intervene, I'd say something to him later in private.

Cocksure US Army Ranger
02/03/14 9:25 pm

Oh damn, Republicans finally won one.

bMyComrade Stumptown
02/03/14 6:02 pm

Absolutely. Its my job as parent to guide my child in appropriate interactions.

druggist illinois
02/03/14 3:00 pm

I would encourage him, he speaks the truth. Wussy-boy needs to get over it.

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HotelCompany sight picture
02/03/14 5:24 pm

I bet you wouldn't feel that way if the boy was Muslim.

jessej7
02/03/14 2:52 pm

religious devotion like church or being a christian, is the one group of people left in America, that is never included in "tolerance" discussions or made to feel apart of the community. people will fight you to death over gays rights. black rights..

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jessej7
02/03/14 2:54 pm

anybody. but if ur a christian or have religious beliefs then SCREW YOU right?

jessej7
02/03/14 2:56 pm

im a white christian male of 21. i have gay coworkers and friends. i respect elders. i treat women well. two of my groomsmen are black and good friends. i treat people for who they are amd base them on their ACTIONS. as u should me.

JustBob Your anger fascinates me
02/03/14 7:56 pm

Judging from these results, we, as a whole, are entirely against talking bad to those of faith, at least 90% of us are

JudyMill Living free
02/03/14 2:07 pm

Why would I stop him? I'd be joining him

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HotelCompany sight picture
02/03/14 5:25 pm

You know that makes you a bully, right? I'm sure you don't care though.

MrMilkdud Pref pronouns Thou Thee
02/03/14 6:44 pm

You're going to need to scrape that "tolerance" bumper sticker off your car.

kjs Minnesota
02/03/14 2:06 pm

Oh yes and the other kid would be able to hear. He would also apologize to him and his parents in person.

Swarley utah
02/03/14 1:32 pm

why do so many people say they would talk to him in private? why not speak to him in front of the other kid?

IMO atoms, space, opinion
02/03/14 10:28 pm

I would pull him aside as the question states they're friends, friends tease each other. I wouldn't let my son bring him to tears but would let their friendship play out on its own.

Swarley utah
02/04/14 8:52 am

so you would pull him aside because friends tease each other?

commonsense Read another book
02/03/14 12:51 pm

Smack him upside the head. Then force him to attend church with his friend for a month.

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icytoes the tepid north
02/03/14 12:26 pm

I'd call him over and talk to him about it away from the other kids. Let him know that if it's okay for him to treat the other kid that way, then ANYONE can pick on him for ANY reason they see fit and he won't get any sympathy from me.

Swarley utah
02/03/14 1:25 pm

why can't you do it in front of the other kid? I'm sure he would appreciate you Sticking up for him.

icytoes the tepid north
02/03/14 2:10 pm

Because the way I'm going to talk about it will be somewhat humiliating, and 2 wrongs (humiliating him in front of his peers) don't make a right.

Swarley utah
02/03/14 3:52 pm

I guess, but humiliating him in private is wrong too. so, sometimes too wrongs do make a right?

icytoes the tepid north
02/03/14 4:30 pm

I think there is a very fine line, maybe saying if humiliate him is a little much, but I'd try to put him in the other kids shoes. For example: "how would you feel if they found out you wet the bed until you were 10 and started telling everyone?"

Shazam Scaramouche, OH
02/03/14 12:19 pm

I'd wait to see how it played out, and chat with my son later.

TopsQueen Oregon Coast
02/03/14 9:22 am

I would. We do not put other peoples faith down. I would gently intervene at the time. And I would talk to my son privately. That members of our ancestry paid for the freedom of religion with their lives.

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cowboy Dog Lives Matter
02/03/14 9:08 am

Yes. A nice slap to the back of the head should get his attention.

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foxycheese202 A Mormon
02/03/14 8:55 am

I'm certain my parents would have dragged me by the ear and smacked me in front of my friends for being a bully, them took me in private to discuss why I got hut.

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LostBrother
02/03/14 8:53 am

No I get on SoH and ask what I should do. :P

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JustBob Your anger fascinates me
02/03/14 9:54 am

Good plan, and from the looks of things, I have no other choice but to wiggle my way into these lads' conversation

Rosebud Ohio
02/03/14 8:33 am

Yes, that's very inappropriate and rude. You don't treat others that way, especially friends and family.

Liberty Lets Use Logic
02/03/14 8:20 am

Clearly he's been on Show of Hands too much...

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JustBob Your anger fascinates me
02/03/14 8:34 am

I was thinking something similar, really surprised by the results, had no idea there were so many of us against teasing people for their faith :)

FIAT2LUX On Planet Earth
02/03/14 7:59 am

Yes. Respect of other humans is paramount. If he's not being respectful, he needs to fix it.

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DeusOrbus Stay Positive
02/03/14 7:53 am

I'd sock him in the throat.

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JustBob Your anger fascinates me
02/03/14 8:04 am

Oh dear Lord help me, that comment made me laugh.

DeusOrbus Stay Positive
02/03/14 8:11 am

"Haha weirdo, way aren't you at...*choking*" *Punches son* "Kya bitch!"

glashberg Wave when you flyover
02/03/14 7:51 am

No, but I talk to him later. Explain what he did wrong and ask him to apologize

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MrsLizT South Louisiana
02/03/14 7:39 am

Heck yea I would intervene! He is not grown yet...it is my job to teach him sensitivity & manners & respect for other people's feelings...and to NOTICE that subtle hurt...I would NOT embarrass my son, but I would pull him aside & tell him.

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Zod Above Pugetropolis
02/03/14 7:31 am

I tell him to knock it off. He's not too old to learn a new lesson or be reminded of one he should have had down cold by the time he was about three. It's never a wrong time to act like a parent.

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LadyA Earth Explorer
02/03/14 7:24 am

I'd excuse him out of the room ("can you please lend me a hand for a few minutes") them address it. Teasing is fine as long as its fun but if it's a sore subject or makes others upset my kid needs to apologize or at the very least stop his behavior.

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missmorganmarie ...
02/03/14 7:52 am

good answer

MrMilkdud Pref pronouns Thou Thee
02/03/14 7:00 am

I'd casually intervene- I'd act like I thought they were just talking about their religions and make nice conversation until one of them changed the subject. Then I'd explain to my son later about not being a dick.

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HotelCompany sight picture
02/03/14 5:27 pm

⬆️⬆️checkout judymill and druggist. Yuck!

JustBob Your anger fascinates me
02/03/14 8:11 pm

You can't believe that those are the only two on here that feel it's alright to bash another's faith

HotelCompany sight picture
02/03/14 8:49 pm

Certainly not. They're just the ones that have exposed themselves thus far. There's lots of religion haters these days.

purslane Ohio
02/03/14 6:42 am

I'd say something. I wouldn't make a scene, but I'd tell him to cut it out. I think any kind of joking should stop when it's really bothering the other person.

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JustBob Your anger fascinates me
02/03/14 6:46 am

I keep thinking how uber busy my parents would've been attempting to curb hurtful teasing just among me and my brothers, and attempting to control it with our friends? Forget about it

purslane Ohio
02/06/14 8:39 am

I know what you're saying, but I guess it comes down to intent. My 13yo daughter can be so malicious to my 10yo son, and I hate that. Lighthearted teasing that isn't meant to hurt is at least a little better.

MrLucchese If curious, ask.
02/03/14 6:38 am

Yes, I would. I would speak up toward him regardless of age. If they're in my presence, I expect that they'll behave like respectful human beings. There's no reason someone need be upset if it can be prevented. Just because you can say something

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MrLucchese If curious, ask.
02/03/14 6:38 am

doesn't mean that you should; referring to my son teasing another person, not my intervening as a parent.

MrLucchese If curious, ask.
02/03/14 6:39 am

Actually, I expect for them to behave respectfully towards everyone regardless of whether or not I'm there. It'd be shameful, as a parent, if my child behaved in such a manner.

Rob Be Safe Be Smart
02/03/14 6:35 am

I remind him later not to be a dįck about it, but I don't intervene unless it's getting physical..

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rons on top of the world MA
02/03/14 6:30 am

If the other boy is required to wear a dress at the service then leave your son alone.

JustBob Your anger fascinates me
02/03/14 6:31 am

I'm not understanding this

chickencookie
02/03/14 6:41 am

More snow ron. Get that blower ready. My husband left for work which means guess who has to attempt to shovel. Not gonna work well

rons on top of the world MA
02/03/14 7:11 am

Sorry Bob! My poor attempt, again, at humor! If his Church make men wear dresses then then 15 yo can't help it!

chickencookie
02/03/14 7:12 am

Bob. Ron is correct. He has no sense of humor. Ignore him thats what i do

:)

rons on top of the world MA
02/03/14 7:12 am

CC, good luck with the snow. I thought an inch or two but it's look more like 6-7. I'll start her snowblower when she's ready!

chickencookie
02/03/14 7:27 am

Another one saturday. We've got tix fir jersey boys in city. There goes $200 bucks

JustBob Your anger fascinates me
02/03/14 7:27 am

I can't ignore rons, I just wanted to be part of the funny.

chickencookie
02/03/14 7:28 am

Bob - there is a lesson in this. Ron is never funny. Pay no attention to the man behind the snow blower

:)

rons on top of the world MA
02/03/14 8:31 am

Let's leave it at SILLY! I forgot, Alter boys wear a dress at mass. W

EarlyBird Portland
02/03/14 6:23 am

You bet I'd stop him. At seven years old, my son needs to learn when enough is enough.

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EarlyBird Portland
02/03/14 6:25 am

Whoops, I thought the boy was seven. At 15, I don't get involved.

JustBob Your anger fascinates me
02/03/14 6:39 am

I don't get involved with their conversations too much either. You run the risk of inciting some "hey brah, you're lucky my folks were there to protect your delicate little feelings"

kermie gaytopia
02/03/14 7:24 am

So you won't stop the teasing because it might lead to teasing? I'm afraid I don't follow.

JustBob Your anger fascinates me
02/03/14 7:36 am

Might? In my personal experience, I will, not only, lead to more teasing, it will drastically increases it.

JustBob Your anger fascinates me
02/03/14 7:58 am

It not I, there seems to be something Freudian with that

Praetorianus Fair enough.
02/03/14 6:13 am

If he isn't threatening or bullying, why should I? Free speech. Besides, in this situation I'd suspect he learned that from yours truly ;)

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JustBob Your anger fascinates me
02/03/14 6:21 am

I wanted to see how this question would compare to ripping on the boy for seeing a therapist. What would define bullying?

JudyMill Living free
02/03/14 2:11 pm

I agree with praetorianus, he probably learned from me as well. And Bob, I don't think this compares at all to therapy, therapy is real

JudyMill Living free
02/03/14 3:09 pm

Yes it is, therapy is based on real science, not a book written thousands of years ago

JustBob Your anger fascinates me
02/03/14 4:07 pm

Aye, but the outcome beith the same, if thou shalt believe, thou shalt reap the spiritual benefits. If I go into therapy thinking that this will never work for me, do you think I'll gain anything from the therapy?

JudyMill Living free
02/03/14 4:15 pm

No, but therapy is completely different, the people are going through it to better their mental state, balance their lives, or deal with personal trauma. Not the same thing!

JudyMill Living free
02/03/14 4:26 pm

Let's see how many think they're the same

chickencookie
02/03/14 6:12 am

This is in front of you? I would. Because he's also insulting you.

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